My Breastfeeding Battle

Since I knew I was not returning to work after my second child, I was more determined to breastfeed. In the first month, I, or rather my breasts had every complication in the book. Engorgement, bloodied and cracked nipples, mastitis and from that, I was sleep deprived, stressed out and frustrated. Then, I kept thinking that Breastfeeding was the most unnatural act in the world!!!! A nurse say I had 'breast fever' (????). They were so engorged and so hot. Soon, I came down with fever and was on antibiotics. Still I persevered simply because my second child was a natural born sucker! He was so good at it. Not like my first born who was biting instead of sucking when he was an infant. We had to go see a lactation consultant and well......that is another story.


Back to my second child. I didn't want to give up coz he was good at sucking which helped establish a good flow. I think I just didn't master the right rhythm of let-downs and emptying my breasts which caused all these problems. Also, having NO ONE to guide me, other than books and the Internet, didn't help. People around me were more clueless than me! A lot of things I had to find out through trial and error.

But I had something very important. A very supportive husband. He helped me in every way he could and also took care of my elder son whenever he could. That helped A LOT!


After the first month, ALL complications suddenly disappeared! There was no pain, no engorgement, no breast fever. Just fully functional breasts and a very happy baby which made mommy ecstatic as well. My thoughts changed from "Breastfeeding is the most unnatural act in the world" to "I love Breastfeeding".


The bond that I feel with my baby is so strong which made mommyhood an even more enriching experience. I enjoyed it so much that.........I am still breastfeeding my baby and he is now 18 months. He is still so in love with my breasts and refuses to give it up.


If I was going back to work, I would've given up in the first month but knowing I was going to be home full time, I persevered and I am glad I did. Because of my experience, I have also been elevated to position of 'breastfeeding consultant' among my friends.  Sometimes, its not really about giving technical advice to new mommies. Its just about lending a ear when it is needed. I am glad to help whenever and however I can coz I found out that Breastfeeding is a really wonderful experience.